Jun 16, 2005

The Naked Woman's Lament

For those of you new to the site, welcome! Freaky Friday is the designated day for sex talk on my blog.

***IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER*** This is sexually explicit material and may not be suitable for younger members of our blogging audience.

The Naked Woman's Lament

kissing me, my first thought goes to
if I should have flossed
leading me to bed I’m anxious
how the clothes are tossed

undressing me, I’m wondering
if my behind’s too wide
completely nude I thwart the urge
to cover up and hide

touching me, I ponder
if my flesh is feeling fat
caressing me, I worry that
my tummy is not flat

nibbling, I wish I’d scrubbed
a bit behind my ear
laying me upon my back
my boobies disappear!

licking me, I’m wishing that
i was a tastier dish
breathing in my essence
i am hoping it’s not fish

spreading me, I cringe to think
how huge my thighs must look
entering, I’m remembering
if birth control I took

loving me, I wonder if
it’s all that you had wished
or if you’ve noticed all the things
i’m checking off my list

laying in your arms
i try to finally relax
but so hung-up it seems I’ve missed
entirely my climax


Oh, and for those of you keeping up, NAP stands for Naughty Adult Pleasure, although I thought John's suggestion of "Not A Prayer" was cute. Obviously he's had some disappointing naps.


Anonymous said...

Oh, hell! I thought it would be "Noctournal Anal Penetration," or something similarly raunchy.

Karyn Lyndon said...

No...generally naps are during the day...

Duke_of_Earle said...

My goodness! Is all that really going through your mind during...?

Are you THAT insecure? Doesn't the fact that he's doing all those things, and doesn't stop, tell you that he doesn't care what you smell/taste/look like?

Hint: Next time close your eyes, imagine that he's the sexiest man-image that ever enters your fantasies, relax, and be STIMULATED!

P.S. Even a wide-eyed innocent prude like me knows it's better with a climax.

(That advice was free. We'll make an appointment for your next session and there WILL be a charge for it.)

Karyn Lyndon said...

lol...actually that's a poem from my book, CurvyKathy31: Confessions of a Chat Addict, that's being shopped right now by "our" agent and written from Kathy's point of view.

And just for the record I already think the man I'm with is plenty sexy without imagining someone else. And after 28 years I'm comfortable with myself, too.

RE: being insecure. I probably would be EXTREMELY insecure about all those things if I were on the dating scene again. (I bet you would be too.) Thank GOD I'm not.

Duke_of_Earle said...

P.P.S. Now that I've gotten all that kidding out of my system; nice poem! I'd love to respond in rhyme from "his" point of view, but: 1) I'd probably be embarrassed, and 2) I don't have time to work on it today, and that would take a while.


Duke_of_Earle said...


1995 hits!! You're awfully close to 2,000!

WOO -- HOO!!

Karyn Lyndon said...

Yes, I would love for you to respond from the guy's point of view. It doesn't have to be today...

Karyn Lyndon said...

P.S. You're awfully cocky for someone who looks like a hippo...lol

schnoodlepooh said...

I'm almost embarrassed to say that I totally 100% relate to your poem. (wish i could get a smaller font) (i'm single and gave up on the dating scene)

Karyn Lyndon said...

never give up!!!